Approach
As a whole, my approach focuses on delving into underlying issues, rather than just addressing symptoms, to support sustained growth and healing. I take an integrative approach to psychotherapy, which means I draw from a variety of theoretical models and techniques. I choose to do this because I don’t believe that one theoretical approach is sufficient to address your unique needs and experiences. People are complex and multidimensional, and psychological issues often stem from a variety of factors that need to be approached in a variety of ways.
Listed below are some of the techniques and frameworks which I draw from, and a brief description on how I work with them.
“Since you are like no other being ever created since the beginning of time, you are incomparable”
― Brenda Ueland
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“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change” - Carl Rogers
My approach to therapy is rooted in a warm, supportive and non-judgmental environment. My goal is to understand your experience as accurately and empathically as possible. Being witnessed with unconditional positive regard can help reduce shame and open the door to your innate capacity for change and growth.
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"The process of healing from trauma is not just about fixing what is broken, but about discovering and reclaiming our inherent wholeness."
- Gabor Mate
I recognize the pervasive impact of trauma on so many peoples’ lives and the need to approach trauma slowly, patiently, and gently, to understand its impact on your emotional and mental well-being. Trauma can be one or a series of events that could not be properly processed by mind or body; it is not only a psychological phenomenon, but is also deeply rooted in the body and can manifest in physical symptoms. As a result, I do not focus solely on addressing the traumatic events but also on the imprint it has left on your mind, brain, and body with the goal of helping you live fully and securely engaged in the present.
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"Oppression, to be effective, must be invisible."
- James Baldwin
I recognize that social identities, such as race, gender, sexuality, religion, and class, play a significant role in shaping experiences of mental health and well-being. I aim to create a safe and inclusive environment for all individuals. Your intersecting identities are welcomed, valued, and explored with respect, humility, and a recognition of how social and political systems of oppression may be contributing to your distress. I hope to empower you and work together in challenging and resisting oppressive systems.
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"The relationship between therapist and patient is the crucible in which change takes place."
- Irvin Yalom
Being able to feel safe, heard, and seen by other people is probably the single most important determinant of mental health. Unfortunately for many of us, due to early childhood experiences, we can find relationships unsatisfying and, at times, scary. I have found that it can be helpful to focus on our relationship as a microcosm to understand relational patterns that exist outside the therapy room.
For this reason, if we work together, you will find that I often ask us to examine what is happening between the two of us in the here and now. Openly working through how we feel challenged in relating to each other can provide a corrective emotional experience that allows you to transform the way you relate to and approach the most important people in your life.
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“One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.”
– Sigmund Freud
We will come to compassionately understand the ways past relationships, especially those with your primary caregivers, may have created ways of coping that were essential to survive your childhood. Healing and growth can slowly but surely occur by becoming aware of the way these coping mechanisms are unconsciously causing harm in your life, and choosing more life affirming ways to respond.
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“What is demanded of [you] is not, as some existential philosophers teach, to endure the meaninglessness of life, but rather to bear [your] incapacity to grasp its unconditional meaningfulness in rational terms.”
― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
We live in a time that is largely bereft of meaning-making systems. As a result, some of life’s biggest and most important questions can cause tremendous amounts of distress. Directly exploring existential questions about the meaning and purpose of your life can help gain a deeper understanding of your one brief experience on Earth. Acknowledging death as a fundamental aspect of existence, and exploring what mortality means to you, can significantly decrease underlying anxiety and help to develop a more authentic way of being.
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“Dogs have a way of finding the people who need them and filling an emptiness we didn’t even know we had."
- Thom Jones
If you come into the office, you will meet my therapy dog Goldie, the golden retriever, who is here to support you as much or as little as you desire. Some people find that bonding with a less complicated companion provides the necessary sense of safety to open up more fully in therapy. Goldie has worked as a therapy dog for the St. John’s Ambulance Therapy Dog Program with long standing placements at Toronto Grace Hospital, YMCA Youth Shelter, and Sick Kids Hospital. You may find it improves your mood, reduces stress, and builds emotional connection to pet gentle Goldie, or you may want her to leave you alone. Goldie is well trained and mannered and always loves to be pet, but also is very happy to chill on the other side of the room. If you are allergic to dogs, please consider keeping our appointments virtual.
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“Maturity comes when we tend to our inner children and don’t inflict them on our partners to care for.”
- Terry Real
Relational Life Therapy focuses on cultivating healthy, fulfilling relationships by addressing power dynamics and fostering genuine connection. This approach emphasizes personal accountability, direct communication, and relational empowerment, helping individuals and couples break free from negative interaction patterns. RLT teaches skills for respectful, honest, and empathetic communication, thereby enabling deeper understanding and stronger partnerships.
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“Our parts can sometimes be disruptive or harmful, but once they're unburdened, they return to their essential goodness. When we learn to love all our parts, we can learn to love all people — and that will contribute to healing the world.”
- Richard Schwartz
Informed by the Internal Family Systems model, I view your psyche as composed of distinct parts or subpersonalities. These parts are always trying to protect you, but sometimes they unwittingly cause more harm than good. Viewing your psyche in this way can be incredibly beneficial towards finding compassion for the parts of yourself that you dislike, and allowing them to transform towards a more beneficial and harmonious role in your internal system.
IFS offers a unique form of therapy that asks you to go inward with my support in a kind of guided meditation and dialogue with your parts in order to understand them better and heal the system.
If you are interested to learn more about the structured version of IFS therapy and determining if it might be something you want to try, consider listening to this live demonstration of IFS in an episode of the Tim Ferris Show (start it at the 15:18 mark.)
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“Acceptance is a key to happiness. It opens the door to a new beginning, and it allows us to be present to the moment instead of being caught up in our worries and fears.”
Mark Twain
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) emphasizes the acceptance of difficult thoughts and feelings, rather than trying to control or eliminate them. The goal of ACT is to help you develop psychological flexibility - the ability to experience and engage in actions that align with your values - even in the presence of difficult thoughts and feelings. I see ACT as a sort of operationalized Buddhism which incorporates mindfulness strategies to help you lead a more rich, full and meaningful life. While ACT can be done in a very structured way, I use it as a framework to help with symptom reduction and help you skillfully work with challenging thoughts and feelings.
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"Our emotions are the messengers of our souls, urging us to live a more authentic life." - Sarah Ban Breathnach
Connection with others is a fundamental human need, yet emotional isolation can be an unintended consequence of the ways we protect ourselves from pain.
Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) addresses this by first identifying and then transforming the emotional patterns that keep you from forming meaningful connections. Learning how to embrace the wisdom of your emotions will empower you to live authentically and foster resilient, satisfying relationships in your life.
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“Your path is not to seek for love but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself you have built against it.”
- Rumi
Radical Compassion is a framework for developing compassion and kindness for yourself and others. The very simple acronym of RAIN (Recognize Allow Investigate Nurture) can be used as a powerful tool to help heal your suffering and transform your life, and I have found it to be very helpful to return to with clients.
Radical Compassion was created by psychologist and meditation teacher Tara Brach, and you can read more about in her book here.
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“[Everyone] should strive to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.”
- James Thurber
The Enneagram is a personality system that was developed by various authors over many centuries. It is based on the idea that individuals have a dominant personality type which influences their worldview, thoughts, emotions, and actions. I have found that for some, including myself, identifying your type can be revolutionary in that you may see the patterns and overall rationale for some of the ways you have lived and behaved. Learning your type can also help me have more empathy and understanding for your worldview and perspective, and provide me with guidance to the specific ways to help you grow.
If you are interested in learning more about the Enneagram, you can visit the Enneagram Institute website here.
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"A good coach is someone who can help you to find your passion, pursue your dreams and make a lasting impact on the world."
- Mike Tomlin
Coaching is focused on helping you achieve specific personal or professional goals ranging from career advancement to improved relationships. As a coach, I work with you to set short- and long-term goals that are in line with your values, create a plan to achieve these goals, hold you accountable to this plan, and teach necessary skills to overcome challenges and reach your desired outcomes.
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"Psychedelics have the potential to bring us closer to the mystery of existence and to awaken us to the infinite possibilities of the human spirit."
- Ram Das
Research is suggesting that psychedelics may have tremendous power to connect you to something larger, more complex, and interconnected than our everyday rational minds can comprehend. These non-ordinary states of consciousness may lead to a greater understanding of yourself, and the world around you, by providing a new perspective and fresh insights that can inspire personal and spiritual growth.
However, psychedelic experiences are not all positive. They can be incredibly challenging, scary, and, if not properly approached or integrated, destabilizing.
As a psychotherapist, I am not allowed and will not provide you with psychedelics or sit with you during a psychedelic experience. However, if you have had a psychedelic experience, I can help assimilate the insights gained into your everyday life. This process can take time, and can involve processing how to carry forward the positive feeling and experiences as well as facing difficult emotions or challenges that emerged during your trip. Like interpreting dreams, it can also involve making sense of some of the more symbolic and less immediately understandable aspects of the experience.
Psychedelics can offer tremendous benefits for growth and healing, but it is important to approach them with caution, preparation, and support. It is crucial that you understand the potential risks, and ensure that your experience is approached in a safe, mindful, and intentional manner.
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"Taking medication is not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of strength and determination to do what it takes to live a healthy and fulfilling life."
- Mental Health America
For some folks, medication can be useful to reduce symptoms and stabilize the psyche so that we can approach some of the deeper work of psychotherapy that would be impossible for you to do otherwise. As a Registered Psychotherapist, I cannot diagnose or prescribe. However, I do work closely with a psychiatrist, and can refer you for a psychiatric consult if that is an approach you would like to consider.